The Red Knight

What is a beso-beso? It’s a Filipino word, and it’s one of our ways to greet (and I don’t know if people from other countries do that). It’s like kissing, but instead of lips-to-lips it is cheek-to-cheek, and as such is more casual than romantic. So when people ask you to give them a beso-beso, they’re less likely to mean that they want to sleep with you than when they ask you to kiss them.

So if anyone here didn’t know what beso-beso is then I hope you keep what I just mentioned in mind. Remember this, verbatim: cheek-to-cheek, nothing oral.

I sure wish that the Nightdreamer from two hours ago could hear anything I say here. See, a while ago I was just about to part ways with this woman I watched The Dark Knight with (great movie, btw) when she moved her right cheek towards me and asked for a beso-beso. And after I gave her what I thought was a beso-beso she laughed, “Hah, Nightdreamer, beso-beso! You kissed my cheek!”

I vaguely understood what she meant but I could already start feeling an embarrassment like that of a person who dived to a moshpit, only to fall to the ground. Nervously, I asked, “Huh? Did I do it wrong?”

She replied, “Well, sheesh, cheek-to-cheek, man!”

Wow. Like, my legs just got uncontrollaby wobbly there. And as if it wasn’t bad enough that I knew nil about beso-beso, my reaction was even stupider! After throwing what seemed like perpetual apologies, I added, “maybe next time you oughta teach me how to do a beso-beso.” Then I asked myself just what the hell I meant by saying that, because I sounded more flirtatious than genuinely needing to be corrected!

I’m actually worried because I might’ve offended her. I asked her out because I hadn’t spoken with her for a long time and I just wanted to get in touch with her (and other classmates from high school or college) again. I wanted to have a deeper understanding of her because I like her personality a lot; but then I also wanted to make it clear that I wasn’t trying to flirt with her because she kind of thinks that I was. You probably wouldn’t believe me either, grinning while hooting, “Wow Nightdreamer, you got smooth moves, you smooth operator!” Well, shut up! I am honest when I say that I am not flirting with her. So why did I have to screw up the first day since 2 years that we met? All I did was made myself more easily misunderstood, and that’s just great, because I may have ruined the chance of making her agree to see movies with me again! Worst of all, I can’t even explain things to her, because I will only sound more stupid!

Good grief, I don’t know what to do! I kissed a woman who wanted a cheek-to-cheek! Please gimme a paper bag so I can hide my shamefaced face in it.