Tumbling Out

It’s been exactly 14 days since I last posted here, and I guess writing those travel guides may have worn me out. Still not in the frame of mind to write anything long and analytical, so I’ll just give you one of those good old “updates about my life” post, with no premeditation. Or, as they like to put it, stream of consciousness writing.

Been revisiting the things I wrote in the internet from way back since, since I started writing in the internet. I read my forum posts, my blogs from the days of yore, and my chat messages. I fear that, right now, I’ve lost some of the fire I used to have. Sure, I think I have a better command of English now, but I don’t think I’ve nurtured the flames of passion I had about writing back when I just started. Part of why I think my inspiration is fizzling out comes from my not reading as much books this year as I did the last. Last year, I told myself I’d read one book per week, which would sum up to 52 a year, and though I only made it to 45, that’s definitely more than the 10 or so I’ve finished this year, when only a quarter of it remains. I should’ve known better than not pressuring myself when 2009 started. It even seems like my blog is on terminal status at least once a month. This has been bothering me so much recently that I decided to post something on this blog even if it doesn’t very much fit inside my schedule right now.

Why? Well, I’ve been busy. REAL busy. I’m not talking about some ersatz “soul searching” hipster activity because all I do when I’m soul searching is spend too much time looking at things I shouldn’t be looking at – like videogames or brainless movies – to cope for my chronic ennui for my everyday routine. No, I’m really busy. Authentic, 100%, busy. I’m not going to disclose every details, but I’m taking my first shot at a collaborated sideline, and I’ve been obsessing over it since the last three weeks – meaning I was part distracted while writing those travel guides. I haven’t progressed much yet, but I’m confident that I’ll do better than usual in this kind of thing. I’ll keep you posted when I’m done with it because it’s something I want all to see.

Yet another videogame console has entered my building, and this time it’s a PSP, so that leaves PS3 as the only one that I still do not own. I don’t see myself getting a PS3 very soon, but I might need a Blu-ray player someday, so who knows. What I can say now is that I need to save money, so barring unforeseen circumstances or volley of impulse, I won’t get a PS3 this year. I won’t. I won’t.

So yeah, PSP turns out to be a better gaming device than I imagined. PSP may be the only videogame console of this generation that I have used before purchasing it (two years later), and one of my biggest gripes for it is the stupidly uncomfortable analog nub. Everytime I use it I would get really annoyed by the slightly tickling sensation I get on my left thumb. That was probably enough reason for me to not want to get a PSP for a long time. I only decided to go for it because… well, I’m not sure until now why I bought a PSP, but I’m liking it more than I expected. The games I play in it aren’t too bad either: Megaman Powered Up, Jeanne D’Arc, Disgaea, and Exit, I love them all.

Before I leave aside all this talk about videogame, I’d just like to say that I’m now a moderator of the forum of GameCritics.com. For those of you who like engaging in videogame discussions that goes further than “GEARS OF WAR ROXXORZ!!!”, go to GameCritics.com.

I also bought my first HDTV, but it’s for my dad.

And tomorrow, I’ll be going to Bacolod, which is an island by the middle part of the Philippines. While it’s not exactly my hometown, I spent 3 years of my high school here, so I have an emotional attachment. I haven’t gone to Bacolod for more than 4 years now, so I’m really looking forward to seeing it again, and maybe hanging out with some of my friends there.

I also have to accommodate someone for the entirety of next week.

Furthermore, next Friday I will be attending another Focus Group Discussion (?) from i.ph. The first FGD is actually the first blog event that I’ve ever attended, and I can’t say that I’ve attended much since, but I consider that one one of the more enjoyable events I’ve had, so I’m stoked for the next too. I’ve met some great people because of FGD, but I’m very sad that one of the attendees from last time has passed away just two months ago. Rest in peace, Deyey. I wish I could’ve known you better, but all I can do now is to pray that you find a great shelter in your afterlife.

Did this blog turn out less focused and more unreadable than others? I’m sorry, but I’ll try very hard to compose a better one next time around. I hope by next week I’d be able to rekindle my love for writing again.