Turtle Power!

I was doing few vector illustrations since the beginning of the week, and out of nowhere I created something that I liked very much.

Isn’t he the cutest thing ever?!

Merry Christmas

I give you a Jack Frost: 

My Favorite Things

I’m not really in the mood to compose anything elaborate, coz, bloody hell, that can be sooo tedious, and I’m trying to let some topics (nothing overly serious, though) marinate for a while.

Instead, I’m gonna state a few of my favorite things. And why is that important? A) So you can know my tastes on various things. B) So you can see what I’m interested at. And C) so you can know where I’m coming from whenever I praise or criticize.

So without further delay, my favorite…

Colors: blue, yellow and green (but not together!)

Music genres: jazz, of course

Musical instruments: piano, saxophone, and trumpet

Writers: Alan Moore, Cole Porter, Truman Capote, Toni Morrison, Philip K Dick, and F Scott Fitzgerald

Musicians: Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Bill Evans, Stevie Wonder, Thelonious Monk, Gil Scott Heron, The Beatles, and Erykah Badu

Movies: (too many to mention, but on top of my head) A Clockwork Orange, Sin City, Raise the Red Lantern, Dark City, Gattaca, Grave of the Fireflies, Pan’s Labyrinth, Children of Heaven, and Hotel Rwanda

Animes: Cowboy Bebop, Trigun, Hajime no Ippo, Fullmetal Alchemist and Hikaru no Go

Mangas: Slam Dunk, Ruruoni Kenshin, and GTO

Comics: Batman Year One, Batman The Killing Joke, V for Vendetta, Watchmen, Batman The Long Holloween, Gotham Central, Fables, Y The Last Man, and 100 Bullets

Books: In Cold Blood, Black Boy, The Bartimaeus Trilogy, The Great Gatsby, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Catcher in the Rye, Fight Club, To Kill a Mockingbird, Slaughterhouse Five, A Scanner Darkly, Sci Fi Hall of Fame Volume 2A, Battle Royale, and Fahrenheit 451

Videogames (in terms of gaming mechanics alone): The Lost Vikings, Donkey Kong Country 1 and 2, Super Mario Brothers 3 and Super Mario Brothers World, Sly Cooper 3: Honor Among Thieves, Hitman: Blood Money, Monkey Island 2, Fire Emblem, and Uncharted Waters

Videogames (in terms of story): Final Fantasy VI, Valkyrie Profile, Suikoden II, Final Fantasy X, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, Final Fantasy Tactics (despite the horrible translation), Metal Gear Solid 3, Indiana Jones and the Fate of the Atlantis, Grandia, Chrono Trigger, and Persona 3

Fighting videogames: Street Fighter 2, Street Fighter Alpha 3, Street Fighter 3: Third Strike, King of Fighters 2003, Guilty Gear XX, Soul Calibur 2, Mortal Kombat 2, Samurai Shodown 4, The Last Blade 2, and Killer Instinct 

Illustrators: Yoshitaka Amano, Jo Chen, Michael Lark, Eduardo Risso, and Chris Bachalo

This can go on and on, but I’m stopping now. 

You Gave Me the Mood Indigo

There’s this bit about Truman Capote that never ceases to amaze me. According to him, he can remember 94% of his conversations with anyone. And while I can only wish to share his genius, his superb writing skills, and his ability to document about killers in non-judgmental way (see: In Cold Blood), today I can gloat about being able to remember more than 94 percent of the conversations I had. 

Because it was you who I was talking to. 

Despite having said too often how much I don’t like being reminded of you, the rest of me are more fond of you than my words would admit. They like you so much, that I need not see you to know you’re already here. I can sense you from the way you speak, that unmistakable Ilonggo-accented Filipino words being muttered like the way a saxophone could play any notes beautifully. My brain suspends thinking about all mundane things they pass off as logic when you’re present. Every time you giggle the sound of it reverberates inside my ears for hours as if I need to let marinate every nuances of it. You look like a splotch of colors in the middle of an unused canvas that begs to be painted. 

So you did not come wearing that white clothes after all. So it was red. So you made it apparent that the color of my cheeks was trying to compete with that red polo shirt you’re wearing every time you say something too cute. Did you notice, the moment you held my elbow, that I was incapable of talking, incapable of thinking straight besides wishing that this moment lasted longer? Did you count how many times I said something very random and how I would get embarrassed after that? Did you realize how frustrated I was that I only have to remember 5 minutes of the span of time we talked because that was how long it lasted, because the world had set to expedite this meeting? Why did you have to leave so soon? 

But you said you might come back tomorrow. I can tell you this much: I was at the edge of my seat this entire day, probably anxious, probably too fearful, probably could not feel the ground no matter how hard I stepped. Yet if pressed to say whether or not I want you to come back tomorrow, I’m sure you know how I feel. I’m sure you know that remembering the things we talked about in five minutes is less than satisfying to me. I’m sure you know how much I cursed the taxi for arriving too soon. I’m sure you know I’d like to spend more time with you, if only to test how long I can sustain remembering 94% of what you say. Maybe if our conversation went for hours, I’d still prove to be better than Capote in that regard, but I’d still not be satisfied. 

Isn’t that right, woman?

Heart of Mine, Be Still

Remember (Hank Mobley)

Woman, you ought to know how annoyed I was when I heard that you’re coming here at an unspecified time tomorrow. I was neck deep into finishing the job assigned to me, you see, when that announcement was made and it disrupted all my train of thoughts. I spent the rest of the day fumbling about, not convinced that I wasn’t having a nervous breakdown, although somehow I made it home without being carried by stretchers.

But let’s talk about you. I resent that despite my insistence to not think much of you anymore so I can let go of bitter memories, you are some of the things that have clung to my recent musings like barnacles to barge. What irritate me more about you are why I become so invigorated whenever I wonder about you, why I keep thinking with certain fondness of all the possibilities of the day when you’ll come comes, and why I keep recalling the way you promenade gracefully and the way your smile makes me delirious like I wouldn’t believe. We’re not close. We haven’t spoken for months, and days of your absence haven’t exactly been reassuring to me that you think much of me as I do you. So what’s going on, then? Why the uncertainty, mixed with resentment, then hopefulness and anticipation?

I have a request for you, woman. Don’t try to act cute by wearing that diaphanous white clothing that I saw you wearing a year ago. I try to avoid talking to people about what my muse looks like, after all.

Destination Unknown

You know a blog post is going to suck if it’s written for not much of a purpose. So unless you like the smut quality of ramblings, you might wanta click that back button. Easy does it.

So, still here? Yeah, the reason I’m posting a new update is I just want to push the previous update further down. Google Ads are starting to misread my blog and classify it under "adult blogs". I haven’t stooped that low. I mean, it’s crazy enough that I have perhaps the most willy-nilly blog: where else can you read of someone who reviews a book one day, talks about jazz the another, critiques ads, chastises other blogs, waxes romantics on someone, discusses a couple of magazines, writes proses about sleeping, scorns plagiarists, draws annoying pictures, tries a descriptive route of talking about mundane things, blablablabla. I don’t need to toss in nudity on those cesspool of topics. Or do I? No, I don’t.

I finished reading To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee and, by george, that’s pretty much the best book I’ve read in quite some time, and reading something as humanitarian as that feels upright (as opposed to downright?) invigorating.

But I’m not going to review it yet. My hands are a bit tied at the moment, and I’m afraid I won’t be able to post in this blog that much this week. No, this isn’t another one of those foolish "self-flaggelation" that I insisted doing when I was reading Ulysses, only to fail too miserably at it. I’m really busy, I couldn’t even bother editing this post. So busy, in fact, that even if Jessica Alba asks me out, I’ll decline her invitation. Not that that’s ever going to happen.

I wish you all a spiffy day, and don’t get burned by that sweltering 39 degree centigrade now.

Seriously?!

If there’s one thing I do not understand, it’s why people think I’m dead serious.

I mean, seriously… ok, cheap word. Better dash for the thesaurus. Bleh, too lazy. But seriously, I’m not even that serious in real life. Even if I’ve used that word more than three times so far. I mean, you should try being with me in real life! I’m totally different from Nightdreamer, I tell you. When I see cute girls I go giddy-giddy. I fawn for fantastic toys. I delight at eating halo-halo. I rave about the best movies. I invent corny jokes. I generally smile most sporadically. I often get childish outbursts (although none of the annoying tantrums). I sing my speech (huh?). I’m just weird like that.

If you don’t believe me, why not ask some people who’ve met me, or at least those who corresponded with me via IM? 

Of course there’s a reason why I put a more morose front as Nightdreamer (but I still have a hard time believing Nightdreamer sounds that serious). I don’t feel that I should let down my guard on a public domain. With my guard up, I’m not frivolous and I pretty much don’t run around the room being an Adam Sandler (who wants to be that jerk anyway?). If you’ve noticed, I do tend to make fun of certain people, but I don’t go to the extent of dedicating my blog for that purpose. There’s also a tendency for people to think that unless one writes like those editors from The Man Blog, one has no sense of humor. And while I respect the people from The Man Blog, I don’t think I’ve ever claimed that this blog is patterned after that one. I actually find it quite funny that a lot of bloggers are - whether consciously or unconsciously - ripping off The Man Blog. Speaking for myself, I’d much rather be "serious" than be a copycat.

Improvisations

I started this post with one goal, and that’s to say something random. It’s then that I knew that I’m not so good at doing these write-anything’s. Yes, this first paragraph is identical to my previous post’s, and you’re about to read what I was originally trying to say before someone gave me a dose of facepalms.

There is one word that came to mind when I was insisting on a random topic: writer.

Writer is what the dictionary defines as either: 1. someone who writes professionaly, or 2. a person who is able to write and has written something.

I do not use those two qualities to describe myself. I don’t consider myself a writer and I’m not under the illusion of being able to write. Perhaps my confession may come off as strange to some, seeing that I update my blog often, but it’s true that I find myself lacking possession of what makes someone a writer.

I do not believe in most of the braggadocios I toss around. I also do not believe that a person can claim to be a writer just for doing blogs. See, there’s a disturbing trend of bloggers becoming too full of themselves when their blogs find a considerable readership. That’s great if all it requires for a blog to excel in readability is if it’s popular, but popularity has never been related to quality. That’s a truth most of the popular bloggers gloss over, so instead of having an accurate gauge of their skills they throw their fists in the air believing they’re John Steinbeck. The result? Embarassing chest-thumping from someone with a ghastly lack of creative prowess.

Let’s not fall into that trap, please. We should know of the danger smugness can do to an aspiring writer - actually, to a person aspiring anything. Smug means excessive complacency or self satisfaction, and when you’re smug about your writing, you’re going to look down instead of up. Imagine that you’re on a stairway where the floors represent writing proficiencies. If you do not look up then how will you climb and reach a higher level? I don’t know if that made sense, but whatever. All I’m saying is, you wouldn’t be motivated to improve if you’re self satisfied.

So if I’m admitting that I suck, what’s my business with this "writing" thing then? To that, I give a circuitous answer: would you believe that I tend to love doing what I’m bad at, but care little about what I am good at? Maybe that has to do with why I fall in love with girls who are unavailable or out of my league, but not with girls who are single and have shown interest in me. Eh, let’s ignore that previous sentence. I’m good at calculating, doing technical papers, programming and creating presentations, but I wouldn’t do them without getting paid. I suck at piano playing, drawing, writing and reviewing films/music/books, but I would gladly lose sleep just doing them, just like now as I’m doing this post. Oh snap!

With this thing called writing, I will never stop chasing it the same way as our administration will never stop making up lame excuses for their corrupt deeds. Because of my love of writing I am lost in books, often abandoning real world and imagining my own. Because of my love of writing I read and reread Elements of Style. Because of my love of writing I perceive smugness as the most perverted sin. Because of my love of writing I often lose time for much else. I know I suck, and that’s why I always look for ways to suck less. And even if that puts me out of touch with people, it makes me do something better than those with an active social life.

Communicating.

I will call myself a writer once I'’ve become good at improvising. How does that work? It’s when you can give me just one word and, without much pause, I’ll be able to say many things about it, and without much preparation create beautiful works. Yeah, just like the free-flowing music. Just like jazz.

This is just so… pointless, really. But, read it anyway.

Ok, I started this post with one goal, and that’s to write something random. This is when it dawned on me that I’m not good at doing these write-anything’s, so I bugged some of my y!m chatmates to aid me in my desperate search for ideas. Like, "hey, hey, inspire me with something please!"

One friend asked, "Where can you find a dog with no feet!"

And this is me feeling oh-so-wise, "Dog with no feet? Oh that’s so friggin easy. Just look at the senate, all bark and no walk!"

Friend replied, "Bleh, wrong answer."

"All right, I give up." 

"Where you left it!"

"Huh, I don’t get it OMG" 

"What the hell, since the dog has no feet, you’ll find it wherever you left it since it can’t walk."

Palm. Face.

Influx of Hodgepodge

Sounds like the title of an awful rockband, doesn’t it? I feel the same way about "Quantum of Solace", by the way.

How about a jazz song before we begin?

Deep Night (Sonny Clark)

First, a shout-out, yet again (well, two). I found a blog called "Voice of the the Filipinos". It is unrelated to Chavit Singson, incidentally and thank-God-a-lly. Go and bookmark it. Better yet, memorize the link. It’s simply www.tingog.com. Amazangly easy to remember for those who know that Tingog is the vernacular for voice. Ilonggo in particular. Bisaya too, perhaps. Man, me and my unnecessary rodomontades. Anyway, it’s a newspaper’s editorial kind of blog, which means the author, nick, writes the current events of the Philippines and his thought about them, duh! The same thing applies to another one with a hilarious title "Tongue In, Anew". Unfortunately, the latter’s updates are few and far in between. I’m not a fan of the "update your blog everyday" mindset (really, that’s stressful), but, for an author as well-spoken as Tongue’s, he sure could post his views more frequently. Like, once a week.

Anyway, both blogs are in my dope list. Why? Coz they dope, yo!

I forgot to add a couple more: Manila Bay Watch and Etcetera etcetera. I don’t know what it is with me being obsessed with current-events blogs lately. Could be that I’m sick and tired of our government and can’t wait for change to come. And change is gonna come. I just hope it’s the Sam Cooke’s way and not the Vilma Santos’s corny "pagbabago" ballyhoo way. I visited MBW half a year ago, but stopped because the blog became ads-infested. Looks like it’s been fixed now, though, which means I can now go back to reading the good articles there. Yipee. I only found etcetera etcetera today, and don’t have a lot of opinion for it yet, but initial impressions are positive. And wow I must’ve forgotten how to stand after seeing the author’s profile pic, what with that 1000-watts smile. Have you ever been to electric ladyland?

Damn, they make me wish to be more knowledgeable about politics to write at length about them, but how could I even match the authors of any of the blogs I’ve referred above? Meanwhile, the only things I have an intimate knowledge of are stuff nobody cares about, like REAL jazz music (and not some Dave Koz lounge-y garbage) and fictions that aren’t Natio-featured.

It’s never wrong to pay others compliments, especially if you’re sincere about it. You make others happy, and you don’t feel so bad yourself. It’s a win-win.

I also frequent Ramblingvirus’s blog. I’m sure this is a description that will incite the cringing from all blogosphere cracks - collective idiots in other words - but I sure do like to make people suffer, so (PLEASE DO NOT CLICK THE BACK BUTTON): He’s kind of like a more levelheaded me. Hahaha! Or am I merely a more colorful he? Well, one thing is for certain, I ramble on for far longer than he does, for better or worse. Or should I say, nolens volens? Damn Latin words sure do make people sound smart. I’m being facetious.

Which reminds me, dictionary.reference.com, a site that I frequent, told me of some new killer app they cooked up: The reverse dictionary!

The reverse dictionary lets you go from a concept/idea/definition to words and phrases used to describe that concept. You can enter a single word, phrase, or a few words and hit the "Reverse Search" button.

Alas, it’s not as killer as I hoped. For one, I don’t get results when I reverse search "monkey’s ass", "superman dat ho", "ninja", "zombie", "douchebag" and "light sabers". Lamers. Heck, I reverse searched "crime" and didn’t get PGMA as a result, and not even Dubya. Good grief, anyone who don’t tag "crime" with them are LEARNING IMPAIRED! Bah, Urban Dictionary ftw!

It sure does sound like a happy day for me. It is. I mean, I don’t have a lot of reasons to be happy and perhaps not having a date in Feb 14 should make me bitter, being enmeshed in the season of hearts alone yet again and all, but I’m just happy. The simple reason being, I slept early yesterday. Yay! Sleeping early is always a better way to revitalize, better anyway than drinking tons of caffeinated drink so as to operate like a zombie-panda with the breath of Raul Gonzales and Miriam Defensor Santiago (damn, that oughta be fragrant!). I hope everyone still remembers that.

Get a Play-Doh and bring it to work. It’s cheap (P20 only) and it’s good for you - what better way to relieve stress than to apply pressure on such protean plaything?

Lastly, 2 pointless IM Conversations:

Me: I just went to Shanghai.

Dude: What’s that?

Me: (SERIOUSLY??!! but, kept composure): It’s a city in China.

Dude: O.

Dude: So did you get to see Shaolin Monks doing kung fu.

Me: No, no fancy kung fu for me.

Me: The thing I’ve seen that came closest to that was some fancy Crouching Tiger flying.

[Note: I’m not lying.] 

Dude: Awesome!

Me: But too bad, I didn’t get to see bald guys breaking stuffs with their head

Me: And getting chronic migraine for the rest of their lives. 

nightdreamer: so, you have someone to spend your valentine’s day with?  (note: THIS IS A CASUAL QUESTION!)

elsie: yes of course…

elsie: hihhihi

elsie: kaw?

nightdreamer: nope. nada. single still.

elsie: hahaha

elsie: still?

elsie: single?

elsie: o c’mon

nightdreamer: huh? what’s so unbelievable about that? i’m not like a prince charming or anything.

elsie: nyek

elsie: you are

nightdreamer: huwaw that’s the first time anyone actually said something like that. BLOG NA!

Agila

By the way, I’ve uploaded this last week, but I’m only showing it now.

It’s a sketch of the Philippine Eagle, an altogether badass-est looking eagle to ever exist. It even eats monkey. Just how slick is that?!

I used a pencil first, and then an ink, and then a few photoshop and illustrator clean-ups. 

So here it comes. Click to enlarge.

10 Things

This came from ramblingvirus, and I’m doing this because I respect him. 

10 Random Things About Me… 

1. I’m a vegetarian, and I don’t intend to renounce that.

2. Night Dreamer is actually a song by Wayne Shorter. Now will you please listen to it?

3. I was extremely busy last friday. I had to create a flash presentation, and as if it wasn’t bad enough that I had to submit the next day, I was told just then that I had to submit 5 hours earlier than the original proposed time. I  worked until 4 AM, slept only for 3 hours, then went to see the guy proposing such torture, only to receive word that he was sick and had postponed the submission to next week. Gee, all my losing sleep for this?

4. And yet, instead of going home immediately, I stayed on that venue, borrowed a computer, and did some tweakings on my flash. I wouldn’t stop doing it until my head was searing. AND YET, I didn’t feel tired. My flash teacher was also with me then, and we spent hours chatting. And that was fun. There’s nothing that energizes me more than an intellectually stimulating conversation, and it’s been a while since I talked to someone for that long.

5. In case you don’t know about this, my real life self is the most apart to my persona as Nightdreamer. I’m tongue-tied, am quite shy, and am vaguely nice. No, really, I kid you not.

6. Also, I seem to be more interested in talking to people who are more artistically-inclined (which is one way I describe my flash teacher). Perhaps it has something to do with having a pianist as a sister and a comic artist as a brother, but something about the way artists perceive the world never ceases to amaze me. At least, I find creative-thinkers much more fun to be with than those typical social-climbing frappe-swirling yuppie scum garbage whose conversations - most of which are done on Starbucks - only involve cars, celebrities and fashions.

7. I was supposed to write items 3-6 on a seperate post, but my head aches and I couldn’t express them eloquently.

8. I like to nitpick double standards.

(And one of the most recent double-standard that I’ve spotted, unfortunately, come from sports journalists. NBA ones, in particular. Just last week, Boston defeated Minnesota by one point, and I expected to read that Minnesota does not actually suck that much. Instead, the journalists recounted this like Boston did the most awesome thing ever, and was gushing Kevin Garnett as if he sends these journalistic jesters free passes to the local strip clubs. The irony is that KG didn’t even do well on that particular day. Also, a day before this one, Miami lost to San Antonio by one point, and the recount sounded like Miami was the stupidest team ever even if they were only a point behind last year’s champion. And you know what this reminds me? The Kobe-Lebron favoritism bull. That is, if Lebron scores 50 points people would go "OMG he rulez!!!" but when Kobe scores 50 points, people would go "ay, bwakaw yan!" [translation: he’s a ball-hog].)

9. My office desk contains a lot of weird trinkets. Art papers, origami-folds, novels, Transformer toys, and play-dohs.

10. When I’m done with Isaac Asimov’s Foundation and Chinua Achebe’s Things Fall Apart, I’ll be reading Odyssey, and then Ulysses. Actually, it’s Ulysses I’m most preparing for. It’s a heavy read.

People I’m tagging?

Well, anyone. But if pressed to list 10 down,

Brad, liz, cai, wits, schumey, J, fence, novz, cyril, dhey, michelle. The reason being, I just want to hear from them, is all. 

My Streams of Consciousness Part Two

I have a friend who lives near me, and he has a girlfriend who also lives nearby. His girlfriend and I also happen to be working in the same area, so we often take the same public vehicles home. 

But despite all these, and despite us being quite familiar of each other’s appearances, we’ve never spoken to each other. Truth to be told, I’d love to talk to her. My life’s been such a bore since this year started. Really, I’d love to talk to anyone. But after seeing her body language, I change my mind. 

To be exact, with or without her boyfriend besides, she deliberately ignores my presence and pretends to be asleep. She does not “wake” even if I’m chatting with her boyfriend - and I’m not much of a chatter in real life so I don’t believe that I’m disrupting their “conversation time” at all - perhaps to show that she has no interest in what I’m saying. What’s the deal with that? She thinks I lack the cognitive skills to see through her put-ons? So, yeah, this jeep we were on skidded abruptly, and her legs stood on the same spot instead of being pulled by inertia. 

If she candidly admits not wanting to be my friend, I’d have been cool.  But these acts do not simply suggest so. They also suggest that I’m not worth being respected. Point taken, since she’s trying to imply that I lack intelligence. That’s perhaps the worse kind of dissing anyone can get, and I hope she does not become the receiving end of it from someone else. I’m only disappointed of her using such a dumb tactic to imply that I lack intelligence, and I sure like to know what kind of dimwit will believe in her façade.

Whenever I’m not pissed off about other people, I’m pissed off about myself. And this self-loathing peaks whenever I lack inspiration. Perhaps you know that I’ve been taking up classes on web design. I’m currently doing my final project, and I’m trying to make it a magnum opus of sorts. Now if only I could come up with anything I’d find aesthetically pleasing. 

I went to multiple bookstores and, in my hunger for ideas, browsed through a few coffee-table books, none of which left me feeling sated. Blargh! As I was about to leave the mall, I heard a melodious call of my name, and that was it, my inspiration: a resplendent woman, who I’ve met three years ago and thus far have only seen thrice in my whole life. I was overwhelmed with the desire of lolling around with her, but our meeting was cut short, because she had to attend a meeting. 

And then I recall that I’ve never talked to her for longer than 10 minutes. I griped. 

So there goes my inspiration, coming and going as fugaciously as a soda’s fizz. I looked at her go, and I looked at her blur. And I wondered why everyone is so busy. 

Two girls, different sentiments, but all bitter. Perhaps, just another day in my life?

Sweets? Hots?

A slow day in the office… 

Dong: Hey, nightdreamer, would you like some chocolates?

Me: Sure! Thanks! I do notice that you like to have chocolates with you.

Dong: Of course, that’s because I like sweets. I’m a sweet guy!

Me: Ha, then since I like hot foods, what does that say about me?

Lop: That you have a hot temper.

Me: Shut up!

Lop: I rest my case.

Time-waster

I don’t have the stats, but I think the majority of my readers will have a few vacation days. Am I correct? 

Some of us (yeah, that includes me) will be spending theirs traveling at a foreign land, but others won’t be that busy. In fact, it’s entirely possible that because of many days of not working or studying, you might get bored and be at a loss in finding something that's fun doing. 

I have one suggestion: Paper-folding. 

Yes, paper-folding, or better known in Japanese as Origami. It’s my first love, and I found it at an age when papers were more appealing than girls. 

You know, I don’t think that’s very implausible for older people. We have all kinds of men's magazines everywhere these days, but have you ever seen their models in person? Are they really that attractive, or have their appearances been doctored by Photoshophile pricks? Anyone heard of the so-called Angelica Panganiban scandal? (Frankly I still don't understand why a lot are splitting hairs on that issue) Yeah it's entirely possible for people to drool on all these photos but not on the photoed actual self.

Thank goodness I was eventually struck with puberty. It's better to be frustrated of not having a girlfriend that to be frustrated of not having a paper friend.

But let's talk about paper today. What, you want me to talk about girls instead and offer you suggestions on what you should be doing with them? I'm not a ladies' man! And if that's who you want you should go read somebody else's blog, like those of real pimps or those of some stupid ass "trying to be cool" epal guys who think they're so pimp-ish. Believe me, a lot of people belong in that latter category. But this is where it ends; no more talking about the human condition. Subject: real papers, not people who are like papers.

So then, Origami. I'm going to show you the overview of the craft. It's quite easy to get into, and it isn't terribly expensive, effort-wasting or time-consuming. The good news is that the fun starts even in just making the basic projects, like the paper boat or the paper plane. I think everyone and their moms know how to do something like this:

Pretty simple, innit? You can substitute your rubber ducky with a paper boat when you dip into your jacuzzi while pondering the science of buoyancy. Meh. Science is boring. So, instead, watch the boat in amazement because it floats exactly as long as a relationship from high school. Quite humdrum? Maybe, but did you know about tearing the head and the tips of the boat? Try it, and you'll get:

That's right, a shirt! So step aside Ben Chua you've just met your match! Too bad it won't fit even the most anorexic supermodel, but you can dress your chihuahua up with this paper-ish trash if that floats your, um, paper boat. 

If in case you find yourself stuck in the room with noisy 5 year-olds who keep bugging you to entertain them, you may want to try folding a paper plane. 

You're well aware that you can throw paper planes and let them glide, right? Try going to high-rise buildings, then glide these planes all the way down to the ground level (uh, make sure you go right down to clean up your mess too, okay?) Wonderful sight, the joy of flying, like cottons dancing with the lissome breeze. Write what you saw and, congratulations, you've finished the reaction paper of Jonathan Livingston's Seagull!

With both paper boats and planes, you use rectangular papers. Normal papers, that is. Unfortunately for a greater majority of other projects, you need equilateral papers. So unless you can buy squared papers or memo pads (which could be too small for some Origami projects) expect to be doing this a lot:

You'll be doing that so much that you'll curse the human race. I mean, geez, how many trees could we have saved if more papers were squared instead of rectangular? For all the science we obsess ourselves with, why are we so incapable of making the most pragmatic decisions? It's about time we evolve and MAKE THOSE PAPERS SQUARE! HURRY, THE EVOLUTION WILL NOT BE TELEVISED! Anyhoo, the remaining rectangular strip is rather problematic, as there aren't a lot of projects that looks good with something of that size and proportion. There's one that I know of, and it looks like this:

It's supposed to be a spaceship. Star Trek-ish or F-Zero-y. It looks quite cool at the first glance, but if you keep making that, passersby will think that you're a gigantic nerdbag, kind of like what happens when you go to the beach and people see you reading a sci-fi/fantasy book with all these dragons, dwarves and bikini-clad witches at the cover.

Moving on, let me introduce you to the Crane.

Now heed this: every self-respecting origami enthusiasts MUST know how to make a crane, just like how every pianist must learn Czerny. It's not just because most of origami's basic folds are included in making a crane. It's also because the crane is culturally significant. In Japan, paper cranes are believed to be lucky charms. They are connected by a thread and hanged on the doorstep.

Crane-making is also addicting. Some people only learn how to make that without trying other origami projects. My sister's an example. Just go to her room and you'll find this:

Yeah, so the next time you give her memo pads, you might as well sing, "Why to cranes suddenly appear…"

I advise you not to be stuck with cranes. There are a lot of other origami projects that give beautiful results. Like the peacock, for example:

Some of them are even practical, like the box:

You can use it as a mini trash box or ash tray or something to hold your spit or booger. Speaking of which, I just remembered walking past a jerk who spat on the ground. He just nearly hit my shoe, and I was pissed off to the extent that I wanted to kick him in the face (uh, he's short, that explains my confidence). Good Lord what is it with the manner of some people? I hope he goes to Singapore soon.

How about something complexly designed?

I don't even know what that is, but I find it attractive. Kind of like girls. I don't even know what they are, and yet I want to marry one of them. 

And this one's incredibly fun:

When you blow it at one end, it will inflate into:

Now how cool is that, you JUST MADE YOURSELF A MIRIAM DEFENSOR SANTIAGO'S BALL!

So anyway, if you want to learn origami, you can go to your nearest bookstore to buy some art papers and buy an origami instruction book. But they're not required. As long as you have an internet connection and a few paper, you can always google for some origami sites where you'll find instructions for a lot of project.

Have fun!

About FGD (edited and cleaned)

I'm not in the position to disclose the details, but for those of you who blog with i.ph, you will get a fat list of new features coming very soon.

How do I know this? I participated in i.ph's FGD yesterday. Heck if I remember what that acronym stood for. I was among those who were invited to join this discussion, where the big boss of i.ph would present some new features and ask for our comments or ideas. We were so cordial to each other that it's like we were some hippies high-5-ing and weed-sharing at Washington Square. Of being treated like this, I felt so privileged, and I…

Oh, has everyone left the building?

*Deep breathes*

Dammit, I'll be honest. I don't know if wits (he was beside me) or Peter Juan (the big boss) noticed, but I was in such a nervous wreck! The entire time! Look, there I was, side by side with bloggers who know, write and smile better than I do (# # # # # # - I need to verify some of the other attendees's links). Compared to them I was like a troglodyte spending the first night in the city. I looked very silly being offered the same privilege as them when, writing-proficiency speaking, I wasn't even among their peers. And their toothbrushes were better than mine too. I don't even think I'm that good of a writer to begin with, and my being there felt like having Bob Ong sit besides Toni Morrison, Orhan Pamuk, and Alice Walker on a press-con. Have you ever felt guilty of being treated like a VIP along with people who deserved it FAR MORE?

Take a gander at my blog. (yeah ok so this really is a moronic come-over statement of epic proportions, because how the hell could anyone have read this far without having already taken a "gander" at my blog? It's like coordinating a game where you start with "want to play a game?" followed by "let’s play a game" before announcing the mechanics. I mean what the heck stop wasting our time and get to the point already. Kind of like what I'm not doing now. And I'm certain that you've already forgotten the statement that came before all these parenthetical junk [what, you're back-reading? Cheater…] but I like seeing your confused face so haha. Anyway, do you think that starting with 'take a gander at my blog' is incredibly dumb too? Yeah? Agree? *High fives*.) How could I even compare to the whole lot of everyone in my dope list? (Yeah, I probably wrote longer parenthetical statements than they ever did, so cue the dumb-smuggery [sounds a lot like “douchebaggery”].)

You know how it felt to be nervous? It was like being transported to another planet with capricious gravity (now that's an idea I like. Wistful me: "Please gravity be light now, so I can dunk like Josh Smith!"). Then I'd be itchy in an unknown region, and I would try to locate the source of itch by scratching random parts of my feet/legs/palms/elbows but I wouldn't feel the itch leaving nor the pain coming even if my skins were already reddish.There was also the trademark hands-shaking and eyesights-fading.

I did enjoy the FGD, but not to the extent that I hoped. That really wasn't anyone's fault but mine, because although it was a very enlightening event, I had been uneasy all throughout that when it ended I kept telling Ley (she works there) that I was so nervous, but she only shot me back this "what pot is he smoking" look because I didn't appear nervous. My God if only she knew how I felt, um, with being among that roomful of better writers.

So anyway, if you blog with i.ph you'll be having a slew of new features in the not-so-distant future. And if you've read this pointless post up to this point (groans of "not again" heard from crowd) you'd also know that my self-esteem had taken a nosedive. Yeah, dotPH will improve. My writing skills need to too so, you know what, I'm going to sharpen my pencils and wipe clean my reading glasses.

They will be useful this Christmas.

Dope Blogs

If you've paid attention to all of my blog's content - meaning you have a crush on my blog - you'll find a section called "Dope Blogs". 

What are these? They're my "blogroll", except I hate the world blogroll. It sounds like a stack of underwear falling, and rolling afterwards. Gee, what is it with me and underwear anyway? I hope that makes it abundantly clear how much I hate that word, so if you feel tempted in adding me to some list (why thank you!), don't tag by saying you'll put me in your blogroll. That'll make me think you've got obsessions on rolling me in your underwear. Eww.

Today I will introduce you to those blogs on my list. What should you expect? Why, that today's entry will be more optimistic! Like rainbow and butterfly and polka dot pants optimistic. Well, ok, not like that. Expect this to be sort of like when I acquiesced with my classmates in singing "If we hold on together", but because I'm such a hardened rebel, I sang "If we hurled on together" instead. That kind of better-than-refusing optimism. If that intimidates you, go read some clinical Bob Ong tripe or something. If that does not intimidate you, then please be comfortable, for I will exalt these authors and give you a worship guide! Why? Because I love my readers! 

"But Nightdreamer, that sounds so weird coming from you!"

Shut up! I hate you!

Gene Park # - He's a journalist from Hawaii and is quite a guru on worldly issues. I don't know where he gets all his knowledges from, but I like reading him because I often end up learning a lot.

Mike Doolittle # - He's a personal trainer, who likes to play videogames and build high-end PC's. He also spends his time playing the guitar and reading religious books. Sounds weird enough? 

Casa de Bracken # - It's really painful that I have to wait a month before Mike Bracken updates his blog with comprehensive reviews of movies, games, comics or whatever it is he's geeking out on. 

Unfortunately the first 3 blogs require a myspace account to read.

Sam Oh Show # - Yes, it's Sam Oh, the host from ETC. We actually know each other, and she was the one who introduced me to Murakami (and I hope she's enjoying Watchmen, a graphic novel I encouraged her to read). Unfortunately, I think she's deleted her friendster blog, so if anyone knows if she has another blog, please inform me.

The Philippine Experience # - Allow Schumey to brush up your knowledge of the Philippine culture, people and politics. It's political read minus the pounding-readers-into-submission-with-legal-terms. Great stuff all throughout. Power to the people!

Thoughts in Disarray # - My best friend's blog. Michelle's been spending a lot of time getting all different kinds of licenses (mostly medical. She majored in some college of medicine subject) and it's great that her hard work is paying off. She loves the internet more than I do though, so expect a lot of dorkiness. Hahaha.

Astra # - if I'm not mistaken, Twinkle works for rotaract. A good writer, but she needs more updates.

Empyrean # - Ley is my first web design teacher (I now have four). I don't know what it is about being in her company that makes people so ebullient, but that's just the way it is. Is that why she calls herself empyrean? She loves to write too. And she is a Harry Potter fangirl. The book 7 that I read was actually hers; too bad I didn't like the book.

Dirty Lil Secret # - Aunt Adelaine from Malaysia, oh how I love to tease her around. Right, aunt?

Nifty Universe # - Novz is probably less old-fashioned than the name of his blog suggests. Haha I so love making fun of people. Please don't do that to me though, because I'm tall. Kidding. Anyway, novz love of writing seem to be at a recrudescence, and he might post short stories someday. I hope I could do the same.

At Wit's End # - Hardly. Your wit will not end with reading dhey's posts, unlike when you read my awful puns. Ouch did I write that? Sorry, I'm not erasing it. YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! I don't know what it is about dhey's blog that is so addicting. Maybe it's the unpretentious humility, the simplicity and the optimism of it?

EOD's Other Side # - I admit I haven't read her that much, but I like some of her Photoshopped works.

Cubicled Playground # - I suppose it's about corporate topics. Also, Cyril's married for 2 years. He's a new blogger. Having a newfound love for writing, perhaps?

The Nut Box # - YOU WILL LOVE THIS BLOG AND IF YOU DON'T I WILL HYPNOTIZE YOU! Reading J is like talking to a child prodigy whose head is not all in the clouds unlike some arrogant "genius" that I know of who'd talk down to others as "not the same level". So, yes, J and I are at the same level. Hahaha!

[disclaimer: in case you may think that I made that "genius" guy up, I did not. And also, I'm not talking about me, I promise.] 

The Exile of a Superstar # - I only met wits recently, and already I'm finding his blog posts very entertaining. And creative too. Too bad he's an Atenean. Saying you're Atenean is like admitting that you listen to Michael Learns to Rock. Hahaha! By the way I have like two blogs on my list that has "wit" in them somewhere, so what does that say about the person compiling the list? Probably not acerbically much?

Behind the Shrubbery # - Yeah, you tell them Liz, nothing should be taken at the face value EVAR!!!1111 So all you graphic junkies who laud Transformers (2007) because it has all these CG's, I'm sorry to say this but TRANSFORMERS SUCKS! Anyway, read Liz if you like sci fi, philosophy and politics. And if you don't, then go read the confession of some heiress or something, you productive "deipnosophist"!

Tainted Song # - If she was actually Joni Mitchell it would be tres cool (and blue) but as it is, Tainted Song is still quite good. And Joni, for some reasons, is really enamored with Michelle's blog. Also, there's something to be said about my constant digressions or corninesses. What does it say about me? I don't want to find out.

Tales of the Fencesitter # - I only just added fence, so I don't have too much comment. But yeah, he writes well, and yet he's claiming to have a Dominique Francon moment? I shrugged.

Drinking Coffeecola # - "it is good and it's good for you" is what Brad will tell you. He testified that mixing coffee and cola made for a drink that have him stay awake finishing a video game he rented. I don't want to know how it tastes though. His blog is new, but I've read him in too many places to realize that he's got skillz! Go figure how.

Those are my list of blogs worth reading. Anyone knows more?

O Hai!

Im at ur sk1tzbuk, d01ng a t1tan1c!

Word (Updated)

Nah who needs introduction? I think I'll just go ahead and put a few words I love/hate. In no particular order. I love chaos. Palahniuk would be so proud.

Word: Word

Love/Hate: Word!

Uh, yeah, that was cheap. Next!

Word: Blogosphere

Love/Hate: hate

Clumsy. I was never a fan of the word blog because it sounds so much like the sound of your stacks of underwear falling to the ground. But blogsophere?! It gives me a much funnier image, like an entire world falling apart and people are still out there dancing to obnoxious techno (is there any other kind?) while wearing burlap thong underwear. 

Word: Defenestrate

Love/Hate: Throw something out of your window? What word could possibly be more awesome than this?!

Word: Bitch

Ha you saw this one comi-, er, arriving, didn't you?

Love/Hate: Love and hate, bitches!

I don't particularly loathe the word: it works very well as an intensifier. I just hate it when girls call themselves "bitch" as in "Babe In Total Control of Herself" when it could’ve been interpreted as "Babe Insisting To Cumwhore Hersex!" Yeah, those are portmanteaus, but stop bitchin' dammit!

By the way, acerbic wit extraordinaire Malu Fernandez calls herself a bitch. Uh, yeah, anyone remember who she is?

Word: Stately 

Love/Hate: I won't tell you. Read this instead: 

"Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow dressinggown, ungirdled, was sustained gently behind him on the mild morning air."

Ulysses starts like that. Is that your nose bleeding?

Word: Triskaidekaphobia 

Fear of number 13? SLICK! 

Word: Induhvidual

Love/Hate: How could I hate it? It sounds identical to "individual" and people with hearing problems (basically, everyone) will not be able to tell the two apart. So you can call people induhvidualistic and they'll respond to you favorably while you try to hide your chortle. 

Word: Ninjas

Love/Hate: Someday they will kidnap the president:

Word: Pirates

Love/Hate: They're, like, the new working class hero. Leave those Van Damme trash flicks to Video City. In the Philippines, who else tries to cater to the crowd of Seven Samurai, Apocalypse Now, The Man on the Train, or La Femme Nikita? 

Word: Haute Couture 

I hate "WRITERS" who try to sound intelligent BY INSERTING ASSORTED FRENCH AND LATIN WORDS! Dios mio! And something about haute couture, ipso facto, sounds très haughty.

Word: Haller 

(It does not mean a person who… dwells… in the halls.) 

Tagalog Heritage Dictionary says any word is "legitimate" as long as some rabid fans are enamored by the pa-­cute (want to know what pa-cute is nearly homonymous to?) personality using such word. SEE ALSO: JOKE JOKE JOKE, kering-keri, grabe over grover, itsumo kokoro (Tagalog style), pwe-DEH!!!!!!!1111111111111. Really stupid, really. For real. Realxactly. Anyway, say haller instead of hello if you live in 2005. Something like, you've had me at haller?! 

If you're hafi with haller, then ok fine whatever VV. Davah?! 

Anyway, I hate the word.

Word: Non-issue

I don't hate the word itself. I just hate how people (especially defenders of a scandalous president *ahem*) use this word. "Those deeds have passed so it's a non-issue". Blech.

Word Phrase: Superman dat ho

Love/hate: Hate! JUST WHAT THE HELL DOES IT MEAN ANYWAY?! 

I know what you're thinking. Nightdreamer, why not use all the words you've listed? Oh dear, I wish I hadn't brought that up.

In the tavern is a haute couture bard,

Who prides in swindling bitches.

By singing of the blogosphere,

He earns from stately arrivistes.

Of his words are, of induhviduals who,

Defenestrate their riches.

Where ninjas come to kill their foe,

A non-issue to their niches.

And a ship named Superman dat Ho,

Has pirates who loot riches. 

But on 13, the bard has left,

And everyone notices.

He says he's a triskaidekaphobic moron,

But all drunkards say "Haller?! He's Jason."

… 

I'm tired. I haven't slept for more than 10 hours since I turned 24. Hope you enjoyed reading this post, however nonsensical it is.

Bore-vey

(If time allows, I'll post a couple of new entries this week. So stay tuned for that.

In the meantime, I'm doing a survey as a kind of intermission.) 

If I looked in your purse/wallet, what would I find?
- Cash, receipts, cards and ID's.

Do you go to the bathroom with the door open or closed?
~ Why would I want to have my door opened anyway? What kind of idiot does that?

Sleep on your back or stomach?
~ Back, so I can have a good view of the ceiling.

What would I find if I looked under your bed?
~ Haha sorry you won't find any naughty magazines. In fact, don't bother as you won't find anything.

Something that happened today that has made you mad?
~ Well, it's still early.

What were you doing before this survey?
~ Checking my emails and today's work, I guess.

What will you do after this survey?
~ Go back to work.

First thing you do when you wake up?
~ I usually wake up pretty grumpy, particularly if it's on weekdays and most especially if I feel like I haven't slept enough. So no looking at the cellphone unlike that chatty friend where I got this survey from (and boy is that guy chatty. Hahaha!)

Why do you like the person you like?
~ Because she has no idea how much she rocks my world. Err, yeah, I don't know. I just do, okay? Do I have to justify my preferences all the time?

When you shut off your alarm clock, do you tend to fall back asleep?
~ I put it on snooze a couple of time before I finally wake up (or, like, resign for the rest of the night)

If you were given the chance to take care of a monkey for a weekend, would
you?
~ No freakin' way! My bedroom's already "teenager-like" with me in it!

What is the current annoyance?
~ You'll read about this in my next entry, but in a nutshell, it's about a girl.

When will you turn 50?
~ When pigs fly.

Where do you wish you were right now?
~ Inside my secret base in volcano plotting world conquest.

What song are you currently listening to?
~ I ain't listening to any song at the moment.

Have you ever passed out from drinking?
~ Nope

What time did you wake up this morning?
~ 7

What makes you laugh?
~ Your face. Hahaha. Kidding.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
~ I don't remember. I don't do phone sex.

What is the WORST subject they teach in school?
~ Electromagnetics Theory, bar none. I mean, it's bad enough that this subject is about things YOU CAN'T FRIGGIN SEE, but the teacher's even worse, often digressing for 30-plus minutes (out of 90) talking about his LOVE LIFE WITH A LADY HE MET IN THE INTERNET AND HAS NEVER MET IN REAL LIFE and SINGING "When I Fall In Love" WITH THIS FINGER-IN-HIS-ASS EXPRESSION. Arrgh!

How many times have you seen your favorite movie?
~ 7

How was your past weekend?
~ Ehh, average.

Is someone on your mind right now?
~ Yep

Can you say the alphabet backwards?
~ It's a corny stuff to do. Sorry.

What color is your toothbrush?
~ Green

Do you like the beach?
~ I like it but I'm not sure I like seeing half-naked fat bum dudes with hairy legs and chest accompanied by his mail-order wives.

Can you whistle?
~Nope.